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Rebecca Thorman Just read that bragging about yourself is actually a good thing (http://bit.ly/d3b3jq). Which kind of shuts down all those people who say self-promotion is bad. The study says it's better to brag about yourself instead of someone else, especially for first impressions. Considering, I think we could all be a little more self-confident, I'm all in. What are your thoughts?

93 weeks ago from Personal Branding and Personal Development

Bobbi: I can see were in meeting someone for the first time it's not really bragging but letting them get to know what your capable of.
93 weeks ago
paulmacp: I am firm believer that a good level of self promotion is crucial these days to projecting a self confident “first impression”. As you may or may ...MoreI am firm believer that a good level of self promotion is crucial these days to projecting a self confident “first impression”. As you may or may not know via my own blog I am in the first “conceive” stages of the re-branding myself.

One of the books of many I have read re-searching and defining my own process is:

Brag!: The Art of Tooting Your Own Horn without Blowing It

http://www.amazon.com/Brag-Tooting-Your-without-Blowing/dp/0446531790

I have read it twice now and I am using parts of the section of "how to create a brag bag" to define some of my personal branding questions and build the structure used within my elevator pitch. The book is geared more toward Gen-X than Gen-Y, chiefly because it assumes 10-15 years working adult life experience. But I am sure anyone could get something out of it.

The first two chapters goes into great detail about the barriers many have with self promotion, from religious to long standing (dated) social barriers.

93 weeks ago
paulmacp: Without promotion something terrible happens... Nothing! -- PT Barnum
93 weeks ago
Jamie Nacht Farrell: @Paul - like that quote. He also said, "there's a sucker born every minute", right? So let's hope that's not a 'sucker quote' (totally joking ...More@Paul - like that quote. He also said, "there's a sucker born every minute", right? So let's hope that's not a 'sucker quote' (totally joking with you).

Promoting oneself, as Paul explained, is a good thing. I believe the variables that either 'kill it' or make people like you are 1)how you speak of yourself 2) why you speak of yourself (do you randomly bring yourself up in conversations or are you tying yourself into the conversation?) 3) How OFTEN you speak of yourself.

If, in a first conversation, you can get in something positive about yourself; go for it. What do you have to lose? If you can control the tone of your voice and whether it sounds 'truthful' or 'bragging', you can set the stage for the type of relationships you want to have.
93 weeks ago
Jason H. Parker: I kind of feel like there is reason to promote yourself and promote others. It just depends on the setting. I'm thinking that you're much more ...MoreI kind of feel like there is reason to promote yourself and promote others. It just depends on the setting. I'm thinking that you're much more likely to see success from promoting yourself within the workplace, but in personal relationships and networking, promoting other people and bringing people together is essential for your personal reputation and sets the stage for reciprocity later.
93 weeks ago
Ashley Evans: I think leading by example is better than bragging. Let your actions speak for themselves. I hate having to listen to someone brag about ...MoreI think leading by example is better than bragging. Let your actions speak for themselves. I hate having to listen to someone brag about themselves so I don't want people to have to listen to me do the same.
93 weeks ago
Mehnaz Thawer: As long as bragging doesn't equal name-dropping. I'm all for forwarding up your skills, but don't be a jerk about it..you know?
93 weeks ago
paulmacp: @ashley, to your point. That is very old school, that perspective came from a time when everyone (ok maybe not everyone, but the majority of ...More@ashley, to your point. That is very old school, that perspective came from a time when everyone (ok maybe not everyone, but the majority of people) stayed at one employer a long time. Now in this wired world of contractors, mergers, acquisitions, downsizing and global outsourcing... who is seeing you and your actions? Who will remember all them and present them in a fashion that properly represents you as a solution to a problem or the go-to person for a particular skill set on a upcoming project.

Bragging is no longer just for a performance review. People only speak positively about your work when there is something in it for them. They do not go around the company or to a networking event speaking of your work no matter how good it is. Many people feel as unconformable speaking about others as they do for themselves. When was the last time you heard in a professional networking setting (outside of your office)… “Wait I know the perfect person for that job! In fact I work with them, why don’t you try and hire them away from us/me!”.

One final point:

If you don’t speak well of yourself and often how many people have really seen you do a good job? Five? Ten? Twenty?

How many people have you spoke to in networking events? One Hundred? Two Hundred?

If you don’t brag, the knowledge of you and your good work is limited to those who actually witness it. People who witness your good work are what I refer to as “references”. People you may want to work with in the future, I refer to them as “audience”. I spend ten hours a week (networking) cultivating a list of people to brag to when the time is right. I don’t waste my pitch, but I have a two minute elevator pitch ready at all times (with several variations of the lead in – from the book Brag!) outlining what I want my next job to be, with who (type of company) and why I am going to be awesome at it. Someday my preparedness is going to overlap with someone else’s need and then I will have a real opportunity.

93 weeks ago
Martha Nelson: Self-promotion is important in business, but not something we learn as girls. My favorite book on finding your female power is "The Princessa" a ...MoreSelf-promotion is important in business, but not something we learn as girls. My favorite book on finding your female power is "The Princessa" a play on Machiavelli's the prince. For practicle purposes D.A. Benton has a couple of books out that talk about it, "Lion's Don't Need to Roar" and "Executive Charisma". If you are looking for some ideas, those two and a book called "Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman" are good starts.
93 weeks ago
JRandom42: Again, talk is cheap. I see better than I hear. Show me how great you are, don't just tell me.
93 weeks ago
Nick Mortensen: I think if we go looking for articles to help us justify any of our uncouth behavior, we will find plenty of them. Some of them might make for ...MoreI think if we go looking for articles to help us justify any of our uncouth behavior, we will find plenty of them. Some of them might make for engaging message board fodder as well.
92 weeks ago
Matthew Barrie: I think you have it right, Rebecca, when you say that most people could stand to be more self-confident. I think that this idea of bragging is ...MoreI think you have it right, Rebecca, when you say that most people could stand to be more self-confident. I think that this idea of bragging is really just a contemporary self-confidence - and far too many of us feel it is somehow inappropriate to toot our own horns. As long as you can walk the walk, you shouldn't be afraid to talk the talk.
92 weeks ago
JRandom42: "paulmacp: Without promotion something terrible happens... Nothing!
-- PT Barnum"

And with promotion, you oversell your capabilities, fail to ...More"paulmacp: Without promotion something terrible happens... Nothing!
-- PT Barnum"

And with promotion, you oversell your capabilities, fail to deliver what you've promised, and are widely denounced and pilloried as a liar, fraud, charlatan, fake and con artist. I've seen far too many failures of this type than those who don't self-promote.

One more time for those who don't understand: Talk IS cheap. If you can only tell me and not show me, there's NO way I'm going to take anything you say seriously. I see results a LOT better than I hear bragging.
92 weeks ago
Katelyn Daley: Self-confidence goes a long way. I'd much rather work with someone who has the ability to understand and discuss their personal strengths, so long ...MoreSelf-confidence goes a long way. I'd much rather work with someone who has the ability to understand and discuss their personal strengths, so long as they can also prove these strengths. I don't know that I would consdier this bragging. I would, however, consider ones ability to realize his/her areas of improvement as another strength.

Each day should be considered an interview day, if you're not going to show your strengths to those who matter, who is?
92 weeks ago
Katelyn Daley: JRandom- in business today, unfortunately not everyone has the opportunity to see you in action. How do we promote ourselves to these people, who ...MoreJRandom- in business today, unfortunately not everyone has the opportunity to see you in action. How do we promote ourselves to these people, who could have a very significant impact on our career advancement?
92 weeks ago
paulmacp: @jrandom42

Promotion for me is an invitation for others to look closer. I talk about myself not to mislead, or to exaggerate but:
- to invite ...More@jrandom42

Promotion for me is an invitation for others to look closer. I talk about myself not to mislead, or to exaggerate but:
- to invite conversation,
- to invite question even to a large degree,
- to invite ridicule.

I understand that not everyone is going to agree with my evaluation of myself or my opinions. The more I promote, the more I risk. The more I risk the greater potential for reward.

It is all a numbers game and your singular evaluation may at times be accurate, but it is just one evaluation. I will take the risk that some may label me… fraud, charlatan or liar. I only can speak of my intentions and the authenticity of my words and my perspectives are not cheap. I don’t concern myself with the negatives of self promotion for I feel when it is done right it brings my perspectives my thoughts to a much wider audience. Those who become curious with me and my thoughts, ask questions and in the end ether I produce or perish. In essence your recommendation is a safer path but it will never lead to GREATNESS, just a safe mediocrity.

Your spin on self promotion can be likened to walking in a crowded bar and saying… “there you are”, thus limiting yourself to one person… as opposed to my approach of walking into a crowded bar and saying “HERE I AM!” opening myself up for everyone to appreciate, but knowing and accepting some will ridicule.

92 weeks ago
Martha Nelson: All things in moderation. Be as bold as you can deliver and as conservative as your insecurities require. Luck favors the bold, but the reckless ...MoreAll things in moderation. Be as bold as you can deliver and as conservative as your insecurities require. Luck favors the bold, but the reckless end up hanging upside down from seatbelt of their Ferrari.
92 weeks ago
Ty Unglebower: I am about self confidence and self promotion when applicable. I remain dead said against bragging under all circumstances. It is the fast track ...MoreI am about self confidence and self promotion when applicable. I remain dead said against bragging under all circumstances. It is the fast track to getting people to detest you.

The minute someone new starts bragging to me in an event, I look for the first chance to walk away.
92 weeks ago
Kenji Crosland: Wow, excellent ideas. I've always found myself torn between the need to promote myself and be humble at the same. I always seem to find myself ...MoreWow, excellent ideas. I've always found myself torn between the need to promote myself and be humble at the same. I always seem to find myself more inclined to the latter than the former. I suppose bragging is acceptable when you have a mission or calling that people can relate to, if promoting yourself can also lead to promoting your cause, then most people will forgive you for bragging. Hell, they may even applaud you for it.
92 weeks ago
JRandom42: Katelyn, you show me what you've done, how you've either solved problems, or created new opportunities. You can brag all you want, but for me, it ...MoreKatelyn, you show me what you've done, how you've either solved problems, or created new opportunities. You can brag all you want, but for me, it leaves a very nagging suspicion that all the talk is concealing the ugly truth that you're only a legend in your own mind. If your body of work can't stand up to serious scrutiny, bragging is going to make you sound like a wannabe or neverwas.
92 weeks ago
paulmacp: How does one show the world what they have done how they solve problems and / or created new opportunities if they talk about how what they have ...MoreHow does one show the world what they have done how they solve problems and / or created new opportunities if they talk about how what they have done, how they solve problems and / or create new opportunities?

Everyone who writes a resume let alone a blog or comments here is boasting to a degree. Even this comment to @jrandom is a statement that I think I have something to add to this conversation even though we are at ether end of the spectrum on this topic.

More over how does someone with a huge level of self confidence like myself ever get put into check unless I take a risk of being put into check? I don't say things because I think I am boasting, I say things because I think I am just that good and want to share my thoughts and help others. But if someone questions me and I see that I am just not as good as I thought, or as right as I thought, that person has done me a service and I have an opportunity to improve.

@jrandom, you come off bitter that the world is trying to… well screw you and everyone else. That everyone’s intent is to rip off, exaggerate and con one another. Not to help or do a good job first and foremost.
92 weeks ago
JRandom42: Paul, to me, bragging, especially about yourself is "your ego writing checks your body can't cash."

As for the world screwing, ripping off, and ...MorePaul, to me, bragging, especially about yourself is "your ego writing checks your body can't cash."

As for the world screwing, ripping off, and conning me, hasn't the past 2 years given you enough proof already that it is? I don't know about you, but isn't that why Bernie Madoff is serving a 150 year sentence? The Justice Dept is seriously considering criminal charges against Goldman Sachs and other financial firms that precipitated the current recessionary crisis. Yeah, the world IS trying to rip off everybody. It didn't use to be that way, but it is now, and if it takes bitterness to protect my family and what I've earned from being ripped off, then so be it.
92 weeks ago
paulmacp: @jrandom42, I can now see your point, I just can't let myself go there... because then to me, the "Bernie Madoff's" of the world would have taken ...More@jrandom42, I can now see your point, I just can't let myself go there... because then to me, the "Bernie Madoff's" of the world would have taken more than just my money.

But after saying that I can now see from what perspective you are coming from... I wish I could tell you, that you are wrong or not justified, I can’t. We all can handle things like this in our own way.

92 weeks ago
Angela Hackett: I absolutely agree that a bit more self confidence all round would be a great improvement on many different levels. I wonder if the bragging is ...MoreI absolutely agree that a bit more self confidence all round would be a great improvement on many different levels. I wonder if the bragging is more a case of how it is done? I love it when people tell me about themselves in an anecdotal way and it certainly beats having to ask millions of questions. I think it is the word bragging that is the irritant. Prefer your take of it - talk about yourself with confidence and let people see who you are.
92 weeks ago
Katelyn Daley: JRandom- I understand where you’re coming from. I, too, find myself annoyed with people who are simply building themselves up and do not have the ...MoreJRandom- I understand where you’re coming from. I, too, find myself annoyed with people who are simply building themselves up and do not have the ability to “walk the walk.” Self-promotion is risky either way you look at it. From one side, you run the risk of “sounding like a wannabe or never-was.” On the other hand, if you don’t self-promote, who is going to do it for you, and how will you get the chance to prove your ability.

As I stated before, unfortunately we do not always have the opportunity to “act” for those who could potentially have the largest impact on advancement. The way I look at it, by promoting my strengths, I am giving myself the opportunity to “act.”

I am a 23 year old who is responsible for developing and implementing Training and Organizational Development programs. The majority of my co-workers are more than 10 years older than myself, and are fairly resistant to change, as are the directors that I must “prove myself to.” Unfortunately, most people see my age and “lack of experience” before they hear my ideas. If I were not to self-promote, the chances of these people considering my ideas is very slim. Through self-promotion, I feel as if I am giving these directors a reason to give me the opportunity to act. I tell them what I’ve done, my ideas, what I can do, and then they ask me to perform. From there, my success or failure resides solely in my ability to “deliver what I’ve promised.” I still need to perform, prove myself. Through self-promotion, I am just giving myself the opportunity to do so.

Paulmac- I agree that to some degree we are all self-promoting. We go to interviews, we write resumes, we participate in a “living-resume” blog. All of this is to network, to be noticed, to set ourselves up for potential advancement opportunities.

I agree that the economy and business culture change over the past couple of years has been detrimental to all of us. The way that I look at, I given everything that has happened, I need to take my career advancement and success into my own hands, because no one else is going to do it for me.
92 weeks ago
JRandom42: Paul, Bernie and his ilk ALREADY have taken more than my money. They've taken my a big chunk of my security, my future and retirement, as well as ...MorePaul, Bernie and his ilk ALREADY have taken more than my money. They've taken my a big chunk of my security, my future and retirement, as well as a good deal of my trust that financial institutions will act in good faith on my behalf. Am I bitter? Perhaps, but their actions have altered my future, and not to my benefit.
92 weeks ago
Sean Masters: I don't feel that self-promotion is bad by default. Rather I feel that individuals need to do their due diligence whether we're talking about a ...MoreI don't feel that self-promotion is bad by default. Rather I feel that individuals need to do their due diligence whether we're talking about a potential hire, an investment, a job opportunity, etc. It's up to us as individuals and through the web, communities, to sort those who are simply self-promoting from those who are running a con.
92 weeks ago
Sabera (Kapasi) Photographer: The concept of self-promotion exists only in the West, and mostly, in the US. It was hard for me to adjust professionally to the US when I moved ...MoreThe concept of self-promotion exists only in the West, and mostly, in the US. It was hard for me to adjust professionally to the US when I moved here after having spent more than 5 years of my career in India. Simply because here, self-praising is something that's a given. It took a huge behavioral shift fopr me personally to start talking about myself, my accomplishments and my worth, without sounding pompous or self-obsessed. I've written about this partly here: http://bit.ly/6mQBRy

I'm personally not against this practice. While having someone endorse me is always a plus, the fact is that you know yourself best. As long as you're honest and fair with yourself, self-promotion, inside or outside a company, is the best way to position yourself.
92 weeks ago
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