Life coaches are constantly teaching their clients that setting boundaries is important to maintaining strong relationships at work and at home. After all, it does no one any good if one part of a friendship, marriage or work situation feels put upon, resentful or over-burdened. Setting boundaries prevents misunderstandings, hurt feelings, awkward situations, grudges and other interpersonal torpedoes from endangering your relationships. And it’s as simple as taking a few easy steps.

I will never be the person at a cocktail party who either sits on the sidelines saying nothing, or blathers on about the same thing over and over again. I have something to talk about with complete strangers on the subway, or a potential donor.

Challenges arise because we all define “respect,” “feeling valued,” or “working hard” in different ways. Taking the time to understand what people really mean when they make comments that upset you will help tremendously. If you probe a little deeper and perhaps ask what was meant by the comment, you’ll likely find the intention was not what you thought.

Every day I deal with people who say they want to grow their company, community, or association. And I know they truly mean it. Often one of the key factors that impede their progress, however, is how they choose to allocate their time and that of others. When I look at how they actually spend their time, I find that they revert back to their default setting — what they know best.

You know—if you’re considering a dream-job—that the push toward a dream career is not just about how you spend your working hours. It’s about meshing your work life with your deepest sense of self. It’s about having work that matches your values, that feeds instead of exhausts you, that doesn’t require you to leave your priorities at home and check your heart at the door.

Work poses special challenges and constraints, whether we’re faced with lying, deceiving, stealing, or harming. We all have bosses, to whom we feel we should defer. We are compelled to focus on numbers, which divert attention from people. We rely on teams to succeed, which put us at the mercy of peer pressure and groupthink. But our actions still depend on the ethics of the same person inside.

Anytime you talk about relationships at work, people think you’re talking about love or sex. But almost everything you do at work, you do in the context of relationships. If those relationships fail, odds are, you will too. Today, relationships are the lifeblood of business. To succeed, you need to build relationships strong enough to weather the demands and pressures that go hand-in-hand with life in the fast lane.

Take a look around any organization and you’ll find someone in a leadership position who has direct reports, but who couldn’t lead people down a one-way street. Having the position doesn’t equate with having the know-how. The converse is also true: there are people who do not have a single subordinate but are still recognized leaders. This is because leadership is about influencing people, and one can influence even when there is no formal relationship: you can influence your peers, colleagues on other teams and even your boss.

Anxiety is a fact of life. How you use it makes all the difference. If you let it overwhelm you, it will turn to panic. If you deny or run from it, you will become complacent. But if you use anxiety in a positive way, you will turn it into a powerful force in your life. You will uncover the hidden driver of business success. Just ask Alan Mulally. Today, Alan is the new CEO of Ford Motor Company.

Unless you’re planning on working for one company your entire life, at some point you’re going to have to tell your boss you’ve accepted a job with someone else. And even though it might have seemed like you were in an “open relationship” where you thought you were free to interview with other companies, as with any breakup, your boss and the powers that be could still feel rejected, disappointed, or even angry.