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Being goal oriented is important. Most people know that. It gives one a focus. A target. Something to both visualize from the spiritual standpoint, and something for which to plan from a more earthly standpoint.
Yet goals are things which we have not yet achieved. Which means they are in the future. Which means there are bound to be obstacles on our journey to completing them.
Sometimes we know exactly what our goals are. When we do, we can easily see most of the obstacles that lie in our way towards said goals. What we do not see right away becomes clear as we take that journey.
But what if you are not sure what your goal is at any given time? Or what if it is a very broad goal? (i.e. move to another city.) What then? How to focus and gain all of the benefits of a clearly defined goal?
First, take total stock of all current condition pertaining to the subject at hand. Think really hard about every detail of your life. But instead of thinking so hard about what you want in the future, determine with as much specificity as possible what you do not like about the present.
Say you live in New York City. You want your life to change somehow. You want something different, but you can't quite put your finger on what would make you feel better. Set that aside, and think long and hard about what you do NOT like about your current situation. Perhaps you are tired of crowds. Of noise. Or pollution. You may not know what you want to do next, but by isolating those things that make you most unhappy, you would perhaps have discovered it is time for you to make your way to the suburbs, or perhaps a totally rural environment. Where or how is not important today. Just determine where you could go to be away from that which dissatisfies you.
Your job is ok, but you feel it's time for a change. But a change to what? Is anything better than what you have now? How can you know? Again, think deeply about what it is about your job you simply cannot stand. Have you grown weary of all the traveling you must do? Do you miss being able to always be at home at the end of the day, instead of a hotel room somewhere else? Then perhaps this means you would prefer a desk job at this point in your life. Or at least a job that requires you to go only to one place during the day, and nowhere else. Again, you haven't decided where exactly you are going next, but you have determined that one of your goals will be to research jobs that will allow you to stay in one place.
Many advise you to ignore that which is negative, and think only of your dreams, and what you want. But if you are like me, and sometimes Too XYZ to know exactly what you want to change, it can be of great benefit to determine what it is about your current situation that you most want to be rid of.
Don't take this approach lightly. This should be the result of deliberate soul searching on your part. Because just as we are not always of what our goals should be, we are also not always sure what is bothering us about life. But take the time, and put in some mental/spritual effort, and it will come to you. And when it does you are one step closer to having an all important goal.
Have you ever made a life decision based at first on what you knew you didn't want any longer?
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Comments
04.16.10
Ty,
You raise many interesting points.
I think that people only set goals for things that are challenging or difficult, so in a sense, they're always about things we don't want. For example, some common goals -- to lose 50 lbs (translation: I don't like how I look and I don't want this weight.) To follow your passion (translation: I don't want to work at my boring, unchallenging job.) It's all very ying-yangy, isn't it?
However, setting a goal for something to negate is probably not as powerful as making a constructive goal. For example, if I were to say that my goal is to "no longer be unpublished by a major publisher" that would be a lot less powerful than to set the goal of being published by a major publisher. I think it has to do with the way the mind works. When we envision absence there is blankness so we cannot get a picture of what we're creating. (What does "no longer being unpublished..." look like? It looks like now so it keeps us grounded in now). When we create an image of the presence of what we'd like (even if that's the absence of something we don't like), then we can set our mind on it and generate creative paths. Make sense?
I hope this is helpful. Let me know what you think...
04.16.10
Michael,
Thanks for the comments.
From a definitions standpoint you have a point. However I was speaking more to the idea of those who do not yet have a constructive, proactive goal to reach for.
"To not get published by a major house," is a vacuum to focus on. "Getting published by a major house," is in fact a more direct proactive goal. But I maintain a person does always have their proactive goals defined for themself at every moment of change in their life. That they simply can't ran willy nilly to something else simply BECAUSE it is something else. That there must be a process by which people determine what they are running TO. Part of the process is identifying why they want to be running in the first place, i.e., soul searching enough to know what it is about their current situation that they don't want any longer.
By knowing this a person can find it easier to eventually DISCOVER their proactive goal. And after considering what specifically they want to be rid of, their proactive goal, once established, will be of more use to them than simply saying,
"I feel like I need a change...I'll quit my job, move out of state, and figure the rest out when I get there." That works for some people, but my post was designed towards those who like to be more methodical in their journey.
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