
Last week, David aka the Good Human wrote a great post about being an eco-sinner. His point? We are all eco-sinners. If you are reading this, you are an eco-sinner – the computer, the electricity you’re using, the roof over your head (unless you are this guy, who is amazing). No one is perfect, and almost all of us are living in a way that negatively impacts the environment.
Several recent experiences caused me to wonder at how social media gives us new mediums through which to harass, critique and treat other people disdainfully. Just because you can do something doesn’t mean that you should. There are incredibly effective ways to use social media to further your cause, my cause, any cause. We’ll get to that. But first, let’s take a look at what people actually do.
My dryer broke in January. For a variety of reasons, it doesn’t make sense to replace the dryer right now. In spite of the obvious environmental benefits, this has most definitely not been a good thing. In fact, it has been a giant pain. Because you know what’s hard to do? Hang-dry clothes in the Pacific Northwest in February.
Several weeks ago, I ended up getting into an online conversation with someone about hang-drying clothes. This fellow greenie proceeded to one-up me about relative difficulty of hang-drying clothes based on where we live. I disengaged and walked away, because really, what was the point of that? I’m glad he’s been able to get his clothes to dry successfully, but personally, I’m tired of my towels smelling vaguely of mildew.
A few days ago, I was contacted via Twitter by a grass-fed, organic meat company several states away. I told them that I love what they’re doing but that I try to buy local. What could have been a great interaction turned unpleasant, as the company rep proceeded to harangue me via DM for not understanding organic standards, not caring about sustainability, and trying to convince me that ordering from their company on Amazon is better than supporting a sustainable (but uncertified) source 20 minutes from my house.
Big mistake. I love promoting and supporting companies who are doing good things. I would have remembered and recommended the company to people in the future. Not anymore. In fact, even if I end up in a position where it would make sense for me to purchase from this company, I would probably look for an alternative.
I shot back a series of cranky retorts. Fortunately, they were eaten by a Twitter error. I love it when technology takes the high road on my behalf.
Take notes, people. This kind of stuff is why people don’t like us. This kind of stuff is why I don’t like calling myself an environmentalist. And unfortunately, social media has given us the ability to be jerks in new and far-reaching ways.
What frustrates me most is not that I had these two encounters. It’s that other people are probably running into this too.
I worry about the people on the verge of change. What if I was someone who was looking into sustainable eating for the first time? An encounter like that might have driven me back to the grocery store meat section. It may not be sustainable, but at least they aren’t yelling at me. Same with dryer-guy. His conversation with me wasn’t helpful or constructive. In fact, it served no purpose at all. Maybe it made him feel better about himself, but it didn’t make me more likely to hang-dry my clothes. And it made me much less likely to come back to his site and engage with him.
It is a rare thing, perhaps impossible, for us to truly know where someone else is coming from. We can try, but it is at best a guess. For people we know well, it may be a very good guess. For people we meet on the internet or connect with via social media, isn’t it worth erring on the side of caution?
Whatever your cause may be, I think it is better served by listening, really listening and trying to understand where someone is coming from. We gain more allies by being gentle and constructive with people, those who are clearly “on our side,” and particularly those who might be leaning that direction and just aren’t there yet. Sometimes we serve our cause by disengaging from the need to be right.
Social media is a phenomenal tool for doing this. Let’s choose to use it this way instead.