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Coming in under the wire, this is my contribution to Holly’s Mentor Roundtables post
Have you failed in life? No? Then you have nothing to teach me. It’s just that simple. In my life and my career, the biggest gains in my life have come from the result of a huge, drastic failure. Failure to finish college. Failure to manage my vices. Failure at my first stab at a career. All of these things were monumental failures. And you know what? I learned more from those than anything else. And that’s what I have to offer. My failure. My experience.
So what do you have to offer? What have you failed at? Because if you haven’t failed, you haven’t been tested. It’s easy to give mentoring advice when you don’t know what happens when the shit hits the fan. How’d you deal with it? What was the fallout? How did you grow?
Because that’s what I would want. Pain is learning.
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Comments
03.05.10
Each "failure" you site is more a fork in the road, a choice. Unless you really hate where you are today, unless you regret bitterly the road not taken and cry to the heavens about your stupidity, you were merely seeking a different path. And you still are. I'd rather hear about flashes of inspiration we've all had in our journeys, the times we shouted "ah-ha!"
03.05.10
For a paramedic, nurse, doctor or someone involved in public safety or emergency management, failure and death are inextricably intertwined. Failure=Death. Growth through such a mechanism is prohibitively expensive, in my view.
03.05.10
@Halibut - I would disagree somewhat. In my own experience, the decisions made that led up to those failures are what I learned the most from. But I do agree that including moments of inspiration are also very beneficial. They seem to be inter-related.
@JRandom - I completely agree, however, this post was in reference to a mentor relationship, and not teaching a specific job or skillset.
03.05.10
Awesome Andrew, love the sentiment you are conveying. I tell myself, there is no failure, only effort. Keep pushing forward, offering and see what sticks.
I appreciate the reminder.
03.05.10
Andrew,
The larger view is that the costs and consequences of failure need to be known, understood and accepted, before it becomes an acceptable outcome.
03.05.10
@JRandom42 acceptable or not, at some point it time it's unavoidable. The entire preface of this post was regarding what I look for in a mentor, and what I've learned from those who have mentored me. I'm not advocating people go out and plan on failing. I'm focusing on what can be learned from those failures.
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