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I am a firm believer that, despite our downfalls, the United States of America is an amazing country full of diversity, ingenuity, and empowerment. When you look back through the history books, it is amazing how far we’ve come from that fateful day on Plymouth rock. But, yesterday reminded me that we still have a long way to go.
Yesterday, Maine voted on and rejected the same-sex marriage law. Over 50% of Maine’s citizens rejected equal legal rights. Maine is telling me that if I want to marry a woman, I’m welcomed with open arms, but if I decide to sleep next to a man, I can’t even get on the same health care plan as my partner. More than half of the state represents the narrow-minded population of our country that can’t accept that there are people different from them.
This is a topic that really hits home with me, but I’ve refrained from writing about, until now. When I was six years old my mom and dad got a divorce. A couple years later, my Dad remarried a woman. Around the same time, my mom celebrated her “Civil Union” – also with a woman. Yes, my mom is gay. She’s proud of it, and so am I. It’s not something I’m ashamed of our afraid to talk about. In my eyes, my mother is married to an amazing woman – but in the eyes of the state of Tennessee, they are given no legal rights as a married couple. Can you seriously sit here and tell me that’s fair?
Believe me when I say I have witnessed and lived through both extreme sides of this issue – growing up with a gay liberal mother and an extremely conservative Catholic father – you can imagine the dichotomy and being pulled in opposite directions. I love both of my parents equally – their personal beliefs will never change that. However, not only am I proud of having a gay mother, I’m thankful for it – because since a very young age I was raised to accept and love everyone, something I wish could be said for the people who voted against equal rights in Maine on November 3, 2009.
I will never try to convince someone to change their religious affiliation or beliefs. If you believe that marriage, religiously speaking, should be between a man and a woman, I can somewhat understand (although I think that is still ultimately a narrow view). But legally, why would we not give everyone the same legal rights? Being gay is not a choice. I repeat: Being gay is not a choice. If it was a choice, do you seriously think anyone would go down that path given our broken legal system and the shunning of society? Hell no. I didn’t choose to be straight, I just know that I’m attracted to women. Call it science or whatever you want, but at the end of the day we are who we are.
Marriage should never be exclusive
Anyone who falls in love and decides they want to spend the rest of their life with another human being should be able to, and should receive the legal benefits that go along with it. What gives you or I the right to vote on someone else’s rights? Why are we even “voting” on this in the first place? If you are against gay marriage, ask yourself this: “How does someone else’s sexual preference effect ME in any way”? Honestly – who cares? No one cares who I decide to marry, why should I care or have any say in someone else’s marriage decision?
Wake up people. Wake up Maine. The world is changing around you. When will you stop resisting that change? Gay, straight, bisexual, transsexual - We are all equal under the eyes of God (or at least the God that I pray to) – He loves and accepts each of us for who we are – it’s time for our Government to do the same. Yesterday is a dissipointing reminder that we still have a long way to go.
I’ve said my piece, but I encourage you to share some words below. What are your thoughts on equal rights in our society?
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Comments
11.04.09
The referendum in Maine is endemic not only of intolerance, but also how it is exploited through a very real flaw in the democratic process of some states and municipalities. The very concept of recalling duly elected individuals, and repealing their laws when certain factions of the citizenry are whopping into a frenzy (false or otherwise) is ineffective within a democratic structure.
People tend to forget that in fact this country is not a democracy. It is a republic. The two terms have been merged throughout the history of this nation, but the fact remains that in a republic like ours, we elect our representatives in order to make a certain degree of decisions for us. This works when people acknowledge that there own knowledge of society is limited to a certain extent by where there are in it. But that those whom we feel we can trust can be given, through elections, the power to change government, and thence society, from the inside out.
But it is not a system for the lazy, the hot headed, or the purposefully uninformed. All three of those groups benefit greatly, however, from a system of referendum and recall, and those three groups were in fact the lions share of what brought about this disgusting and backwards change in Maine last night.
Another part of the republic of ours is the balance of power, which prevents any of the three branches from having too much power. But when citizen act as their own legislators, trying to bring about some modern version of direct Athenian democracy, who is to maintain the balance of power in that regard? Who is there to make sure that well funded bigotry, and the fanning of deep seated, slow burning fires of biased are not fanned by the enemies of progress? Under this system, there is nobody. The legislature itself can be checked by the judiciary. The judiciary is often filled by the executive with the consent of the legislative. All three tend to have to answer to people in mega-hot headed democracy. And this is why hatred wins in such governments in Maine; it spreds quicker.
As a matter of law, (not to mention morality) the courts should be able to step in and over rule the only uncontrolled and unchecked branch of the democracy in places like California and Maine. And that branch is the citizenry. You are right, this is a great country, but that doesn't mean our people as mob get things right. In fact the mob is almost never right, and that is what we have in such cases...a whipped up mob.
The federal government stepped in, as a matter of human rights, when it came to putting an end to Jim Crow. (Which would still be in place today if there were statewide referendums.) It is time to elevate this issue to the same level of importance, and put an end once and for all not only to sanctioned discrimination against homosexuals, but to archaic state governmental structures that allow it to be brought back from the dead when the duly elected governments of such states say "enough is enough".
I'd be ashamed to be from Maine today.
11.04.09
I completely agree, especially with the point of asking "How does this affect me?" I just can't see why certain people do not feel that everyone deserves equal rights. For some couples not to be able to share health insurance or to be denied entrance to a hospital room because they're not "family" just seems inhumane and cruel. Taking away that right is ridiculous. They are just as committed to each other, they love each other in the same way, they deserve the same rights. It shouldn't even be a question or put to a vote. It should just be the way it is.
I come from Wisconsin, a fairly conservative state, but with more liberal ideals. (It's got a weird political vibe to it.) In 2006, during my sophomore year in college, the state voted on a "marriage amendment" that would define marriage as specifically between a man and a woman. It also would ban the recognition of a "legal status identical or substantially similar" to marriage, including civil unions. However, the way the amendment was worded was confusing. If you voted yes, the amendment would pass, if you voted no, the amendment would not pass. It was sad to see that the amendment passed. In a state where the motto is "forward" it was ridiculous to see such a big step backward. The main issue isn't necessarily that the amendment passed, but that it was even considered and put to a vote.
It just angers me to see such ignorance and prejudice against a specific group of people.
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