There are two ways to look at the history and traditions of marriage.

There’s the sweet adorable heart-stopping made-for-the-movies way that is all about unicorns and rainbows and love.

Then there’s the clinical transactional business arrangement that involves the property and ownership of women and need to control rampant problems with baby daddies.

If marriage truly is about the sappy beautiful idea that is love or if it is the legal contract between two consenting individuals one thing is certain when looking at both. If you do not extend the same courtesies and laws to all people then you are negating the entire concept of marriage, whichever theory it is you believe in. It is basically taking marriage and putting it into a tiny little box.

Since Hammurabi’s Code, laws have clearly been drawn surrounding the idea that marriage is the only interpersonal contract that is legally recognized by civil and governmental organizations. The laws didn’t change much since Mesopotamian times, save for the introduction of authority by organized religion.

In fact the greatest change to modern marriage came in 1920 when women won the right to vote. Beyond the ability to cast their opinions into the collective “democratic” ring, in 1920 women earned the right to be acknowledged as their own being. No longer were they their father’s property to then be traded off to a husband.

Heck, the past 90 years have seen such crazy things as inter-racial marriage and new laws stating that a woman’s sexuality was NOT the property of her husband, and thus marital rape IS a crime. Things have changed not only because the world around us changes, but also because people realize that laws created 2,300-4,500 years ago MIGHT not be relevant today.

I do not believe in unabashed idealism. And while I do acknowledge the rights of everyone to have their own beliefs, I do not see what same-sex marriage is going to do to detract from the institution as it stands. It isn’t like heterosexuals should be able to claim a corner market on getting it right any longer. Close to 50% of us definitely aren’t. We can no longer make this about the “sanctity” that is this union.

Because if marriage is only a transaction, then we have an entire segment of our population discriminated against by virtue of being shut out of certain inalienable rights. And if marriage really is about love, then you are saying that you don’t believe that gay people can love each other. Regardless of either, the truth is that the change has happened. Whether same-sex marriage is legalized or not, gay couples WILL continue to exist. YOUR VOTE WILL NOT DESTROY HOMOSEXUALITY.

If this is the case, the decision seems to be obvious. Logically, methodically, and legally our society functions better when people are acknowledged as equals. And if you have an issue with the lifestyle then this vote will do NOTHING to stop it from happening. The only thing it will do is continue to complicate. The laws are already in place, they just aren’t applied to everyone.

Be bold enough to state the real reason you are voting. And don’t make it about marriage, because by all accounts there is nothing this vote will do to bring down marriage anymore than straight people already have. Have an opinion, have a voice, and don’t try to make it something it is not.

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Addendum

I was actually going to refrain from posting this. But a calling out by a friend on Twitter challenged us to say what we think and not hold back. So I will say this. I have tried to be open minded to all sides as much as I can with a very strong leaning towards one. However this most recent commercial by the Yes On #1 campaign just angered me to no end.

A.) When you use “scary music” in your political ad I absolutely positively guarantee I will lose ANY respect I may have had for your opinion or your campaign.
B.) I’ve rarely seen a situation in which sheltering children from the realities of the world outside of school/home/life ends well.

C.) I don’t know what the heck you people were learning in Sex Ed but I learned what a prostate is, how to care for an egg baby and how to put a condom on a banana. No one “taught” me anything about how to have sex, straight/gay/or otherwise.

You can check out all the campaign videos here and try to find SOMETHING about a real issue. Again, I have a newsflash for parents. Regardless of whether it is taught or not…you’re kids are not morons. I know because I see all your bumper stickers about how they are honor students at their respective schools. They already know. Way to give them credit.