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Still unsure if I am Y. A while ago, I did write a post on texting. It is the thing to do. But I must say, there are certainly other rules that come with Gen Y that are so clear to me.
As I suppose I am on the cusp of Gen Y, I know for sure that my little cousins are Gen Yers. And I know their routines. I do not take it personally when I call them and leave them a message and I never hear back from them. Ever. And I also don't care if they tell me they never listened to my message. Because I stopped leaving messages.
Once I started hanging out with massive amounts of people who are my age and younger (this happened when I moved here), I saw the real deal. For those parents who are still upset when the little niece doesn't call you back, let me jot down their protocol:
-They don't like talking on the phone - they prefer a text.
-They will not listen to your message. They see you called and they will call you back.
-They expect you to do the same.
How many times have I called someone back and said "I never listened to your message. What what was it?" Then I listen to it three weeks later when my phone alerts me that they will delete the message and it is some random message from a family member, telling me about some long boring thing that I don't care about. Notice that I haven't mentioned anything about my friends. Because they don't leave me messages. And in one a year, my boyfriend has left me his first voicemail two weeks ago. To notify me that he saw my dog was on the news. (She was not arrested for shop lifting at the pet store. I actually pay for everything she eats as she devours everything she passes).
I must admit that I am quite the hypocrite. Because I used to have this strict rule that if you called me and you didn't leave me a message, I refused to call you back. This stemmed from dialing a wrong number where the recipient called me back. I called about a car for sale. I dialed the wrong number. I realized it immediately, so I did not leave a message. The guy calls me back. He wants to know why I called him. The conversation went like this:
Wrong Number Guy: "Someone from this number just called me."
Me: "Did they leave you a message?"
Wrong Number Guy: "No, but I am calling back."
Me: "Well, I realized I dialed the wrong number after it was ringing, so I didn't leave a message. Don't you think if the person wanted you to call them back, they would have left a message?"
Wrong Number Guy: "Yeah, probably."
Me: "Ok. Bye."
And I am thinking to myself - this guy is a moron. But he was probably just being curious, right? This has happened about three times to me. So I used to say if you didn't leave me a message, I would not call you back. Now, if I see you have called me, that is the message enough. What is the message going to be, anyway? "Call me back?" The missed call says it all. If you want to notify me of anything more than that, text me.
The rules are simple and I changed.
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Comments
09.28.09
Personally, I absolutely can't stand it when someone doesn't leave a message. And it's not entirely generational; my father-in-law does this, and he's in his mid-70s. (And yes, he has an answering machine of his own--it's not that he's unfamiliar with the technology.) He'll call every one of our phones rather than leave a message, even if all he's calling to do is give us information, not ask a question. My brother does this, too, and he's certainly not Gen Y.
Phone calls are not my favorite method of communication, but if someone calls and doesn't leave a message, I figure that it just isn't that urgent.
09.28.09
So true. I think technology has completely changed the basic rules of etiquette. I still leave messages with some friends, but the majority of my friends, I never even bother to call. They never use their phones for actual talking--just texting, FB, GPS and countless other apps. It's such an interesting phenomenon. Things have certainly changed. I can still remember when it was exciting to get voice mail, then caller ID so we could know about missed calls. Now we don't even want people to leave us messages...wonder what the next change will be...Great post!
09.28.09
This is so true! I don't ever leave messages anymore, and if I do, then it's usually because I'm talking to someone older than Gen Y. I also, never listen to messages. I just delete them all! I know it's ridiculous, but if I've already called you back, then why would I listen to the message?
09.29.09
I hate checking my voicemail, and I will rarely check a message before I call someone back. I don't even check the messages on my home phone because the majority of the callers are telemarketers. The thing that bugs me the most is when someone calls my house and leaves a message and then calls my cell phone and leaves another message. I see you called; I do not need two messages.
The exception to this is when potential employers call. I'm looking for a job right now, so it doesn't bother me if a company calls and leaves a message. I actually prefer this because I would hate to think I missed out on a job opportunity because I was unable to answer a call. Also, if a number that I don't know calls, I probably won't call them back unless they left a message. It's awkward to return an unknown caller's call.
09.29.09
this is ridiculous. your generation is no excuse for having bad manners.
09.30.09
Would be interested to see if this teh sae in all countries it may be more a USA thing caused by the US thr fracked up Reciver pay's aspect to mobile billing.
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