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I've had some serious "meltdowns" in the last few months and I have started giving myself this advice and it works well. When you have an intense moment of stress, simply give yourself 1 minute to be stressed...
Ever noticed how people in old movies are a little.... well..... cheerier than the reality TV of today? I started watching old movies because I found them to be a great escape into a different time, when problems were big but no one really seemed to let it consume them. They still had to have their cup of coffee, and their lovers, and possibly sing about it. I have picked up a few ways to deal with stress from them that I wanted to share:
Give Yourself Some Zen Stress Time: I am finding it hard to admit this but I learned the most recent one on the show Lost, which I finally caved in and started watching from the beginning with the New Jersey-ite. Jack counts to 5 when he gets really stressed out about something and then moves on. He does it because he has to survive and can't sit paralyzed by fear, anger, or stress. Neither can we. I've had some serious "meltdowns" in the last few months and I have started giving myself this advice and it works well. When you have an intense moment of stress, simply give yourself 1 minute to be stressed. During this minute you should focus on your worry, tell yourself it will not be ok, and that the world is in fact over. Really concentrate on what that fear or stress feels like. After the minute is over, you will find it much easier to move on and start figuring out solutions. I think part of what keeps me stressed out is the fact that the moment I feel it, I tell myself that I should not be, thus making it much worse.
Lean On People: Blanche's famous line from A Streetcar Named Desire "I've always depended upon the kindness of strangers" and Holly Golightly's embodiment of leaning on people in Breakfast At Tiffany's can teach us something about stress. Old movies frequently show the type of leaning on people that isn't very popular nowadays: every relationship isn't 100% even between give and take all the time (something that's not easy for a type A like myself to remember). When you're stressed, it's cool to ask your close circle to "be a dear and help".
Fake It: Mad Men's Don Draper (and my personal hero) doesn't mope around with stress. Ever. And everyone thinks he's just amazing, cool, calm and collected. Even when things are really not going well for him at home or at work. Here's an article that gives some tips to creating the appearence of confidence.
Cabaret is another good one for faking it. Liza Minelli struggles with a failing career the entire movie but shows up in a great outfit with a "show must go on" attitude.
Others you should watch when you're stressed:
An American In Paris
Bonjour Tristesse
Seven Year Itch
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Comments
07.29.09
I'm not sure these are examples of stress relievers so much as they are examples of how the characters (Blanche DuBois, Holly Golightly, Don Draper, Sally Bowles) refuse to acknowledge or address their profound levels of dysfunction.
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