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This isn’t a private or anonymous blog. I made that decision early on because a) I wanted to share and connect with people I may have never met in person and b) I wanted to be as authentic as possible. I never wanted to feel like I was a different person here on this blog than I was in real life. I didn’t want this to be a platform for me to be someone I was too afraid to be in real life. There is just one me and I wanted to keep it that way.
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Comments
03.18.09
I have a couple rules about what I put online. If I even have a slight niggle in the back of my mind about whether or not I feel comfortable putting it out there, don't. Those are the things that you wind up regretting later. Also, if it involves the privacy of someone else in a way that could compromise them, don't. That's just a matter of courtesy.
I think one of the biggest problems with writing online, even when using your real name, is the perceived shield of anonymity between you and other people that the internet provides. This is compounded if you have poor personal boundaries as it is. I like to stop and ask myself, "could I say this and stand behind it in real life?" If not, it probably doesn't belong online. Of course, that is a whole other can of worms. Many people don't feel comfortable or confident delivering their opinion in public and standing behind it. Doing it online seems like a great alternative, but it can bring on a whole mess of other emotional issues that you weren't prepared for.
03.18.09
"I like to stop and ask myself, "could I say this and stand behind it in real life?" If not, it probably doesn't belong online."
@Brian, that's one of the tests I use. Doesn't mean I always get it right, but then who always gets it right in face-to-face conversations, either?
I'm also reluctant to post information about other people without getting their approval. Just because I'm okay with something doesn't mean they are, and their opinion is just as valid as mine. It's not like refraining from posting something hurts me.
03.19.09
@Brian- I probably need to listen to that niggle from now on. Especially when someone else is involved. But at the same time I think the standing behind what I write and not backing down just because someone confronts me is what I need to work on even more! Thanks for the tips!
@Kate- I like your idea of always getting someone's permission if you are going to post something that involves them. Even though you may have had discussions about what you are writing about, it is a whole other thing to share all those thoughts on your blog and them come across it and be surprised.
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