Or, really, why your employer needs to start dating you. Let me elaborate.

I know I’m an impressive job candidate. I interview extremely well. I have a resume that could stand out among the best of the best. My cover letters are so confident I sometimes fear I come off arrogant. Fellow Generation Y’ers think like me, for the most part.

I ignored the scares of the recession and job-hopped. I start on Monday. I know right now everyone is worried about keeping their jobs, so the control is in the hands of their employers. However, if you are talented and hardworking, your employer should not have all the control; they should be finding ways to keep you. My new employer asked me the following question by the end of our interview (after I was offered the job): “What can we offer you so that you won’t be looking on CraigsList for another job?”

And, so with that question, I have found inspiration for this post. Why your employer should act like they are dating you.

BE ON THEIR BEST BEHAVIOR ON THE FIRST DATE

When people go on a first date, they are warned to not be too divulging when it comes to personal issues. We typically want our dates to realize later that we can be a bit whiny or we drink our milk out of the carton or whatever else we have hiding in our closet. The first impression at the interview can make or break the way you’ll feel about the company. Employers, in order to ensure a positive start to the job, should be optimistic and display the company in the best light. That way, your first expectations of the company will set the tone. True colors of the workplace will come out in due time, like how Jake never does his damn dishes.

SAY ‘I LOVE YOU’ OFTEN

In relationships, we want to hear how the other person feels and saying those three tiny words increases intimacy. Employers should be giving praise and being communicative about performance often. There should always be open communication between a boss and their employees, just as there should be in healthy romantic relationships. Employers should give positive feedback when warranted, otherwise a bright employee will feel unappreciated. Just as a lover will feel slighted when he/she stops hearing the daily “I love you’s.”

THE “WE NEED TO TALK” TALK

In relationships, there comes a time when it must be reevaluated and that’s when the dreaded phrase “we need to talk” is uttered. There’s the whole WHERE IS THIS GOING? conversation, which some of us really don’t want to have and would rather gauge our eyes out with rusty needles, but that’s besides the point. Employers should evaluate you and take the partnership to the next level if the job is working out well for the both of you. This evaluation will help make clear what each of your needs are within the employer/employee relationship and will make both sides more productive.

EXPERIMENT IN BED

Healthy relationships demand a healthy sex life. Experimenting in bed usually helps keep things interesting. Plus, the amount of sex happening in a relationship is usually a good indicator of whether or not someone is cheating. Employers should give talented individuals interesting, new, and exciting projects to work on. Bright employees can get bored easily and will have a wandering eye (see: CraigsList job listings) if they are not consistently challenged. Their skills want to be utilized constantly and I’m sure I don’t have to point out how that correlates with sex.

Relationships are complicated monsters. Yet, so is a productive employee/employer relationship. There needs to be give and take, especially when you know you are a qualified, productive, and talented employee. It’s the same with dating: when you know you can find a date any time, you expect more from the person you’re with. Same with jobs. When you know you can find a great job no matter what, an employer needs to do their part to keep you interested.