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Here are a few absurd resolutions for 2009 that are inspired by the New Years Eve party I attended, as well as a few that I came up with on my own.
(Note: these are not my personal resolutions, but general ideas)
1. Stop twittering during sex, bathroom breaks or other moments where it makes someone think “Ew, too much information.”
2. Stop admitting to your biological clock ticking when small children walk by.
3. Stop carrying a flask of w
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