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If you've been following me on Twitter, then you know I've been visiting family in Idaho for the past 5 days. I've never been to Idaho and I've never met this part of my family, so I was already under stress before the trip started. Plus, we were going many places I don't usually go (rodeos, state fairs, etc).
Traveling is stressful for most people, and people with J preferences try their hardest to plan for every possible worst case scenario. There is no way to control flying these days. Flights are delayed. Weather causes delays. Flights get cancelled or overbooked. Security lines are unpredictable. Bags get lost or stolen. The whole process of flying can throw a J preference for a loop.
I was "In the Grip" within hours of arriving in Idaho because I met EVERYONE at once at the airport, which I wasn't prepared for. There was no plan whatsoever for the entire weekend, and we decided what to do/where to go on a minute-by-minute basis. As someone with Introversion and Judging preferences, that was a lot to handle.
I did my best to cope throughout the trip (which was actually very fun). I took time to walk away from the group occasionally to regroup and recharge. I worked hard to remind myself that I did not need a plan for the weekend, and everything would be fine without a schedule/routine.
However, my stress peaked on Sunday when I realized I hadn't heard from my significant other for 24 hours, which is VERY unusual for us (5 hours is a long time for us). He was out of town also with some friends, and I had no idea what HIS schedule was. By 4am I hit panic mode. I began calling the hotel to dial directly into his room. I checked the news to see if any disasters happened in Chicago. I checked the local jail to see if his name was listed (yes, I was that freaked out!).
ISTJ's tend to catastrophize when they are "In the Grip." They will go a step further by planning for the catastrophe. It sounds very sick, but I was rationally thinking through what the next steps/process would be if something happened to him. How would I get to Chicago? How would I hear if something horrible happened to him? How would I tell his friends? Where would he be buried? Would the dogs be traumatized when he didn't return home? There were many many more thoughts...but you get the point.
I used to worry that this thought process was sick or unhealthy. I felt as if I was wishing for something bad to happen since I was planning for the result so much. But this is just a symptom of the In the Grip response to stress for an ISTJ.
I arrive back in Kansas City last night and took a day off today to recharge my batteries (which I do after every vacation). My ENFP father doesn't understand why I needed the day off. If anything, he was depressed today because he wanted to stay in Idaho with the family for the rest of the week. Just another example of MBTI personality perspectives in action.
Have you ever had a similar In the Grip experience?
As a side story: when I finally got a hold of my significant other (and gave him an earful about not contacting me) he said, "You know this is less about me not calling you and more about you being under stress from Extraverting and not having control all weekend, right?" Classic.
It all depends on how we look at things, and not how they are in themselves. ~ Carl Jung
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