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Are you testing out a new date, or trying to figure out a new co-worker? Forget the old plate of spaghetti thing, that’s so old school that it's not a trick anymore, and hasn’t been in a long time. Instead, take them somewhere where they have to stand in line. Preferably, choose the longest line, or one where other people have opportunities to cut it. There is honestly, no better way to test out a person’s level of patience and manners than a nice long line.
Ladies, want to make sure your new Beau is not a hothead? Want a man who will be good with kids? Take him to a nice long line, for example, an amusement park. An amusement park has nice long lines, people cutting in and out, and usually a little hot sun to set everything to a nice boil. Nothing will show out a lack of patience better than that nice line in the hot sun, or a lack of manners like a line space holder.
Gentleman, want to know if your woman is independent or self-serving? The same applies here, a nice long amusement park ride line. Is she asking you to hold her place while she sits in the shade at every single ride? That’s probably a good clue right there.
Traffic also works as well. Nothing is more telling about a person than how they behave when they think they are anonymous. For some reason, people treat their cars as their own mini moving island, which no one can see into. I’m talking to you Mr. Nosepicker! How does your date behave? Cutting in and out of traffic? Or do they actually wait in line for their turn? That’s old world chivalry right there my friends, and as rare as can be. Someone who waits in line for their turn, and doesn’t even try to aggressively exclude everyone else?
My point is, you are who you are all the time. People put on one face in public, and one in private, and often another under stress. So if you really want to see who you might one day have to live with, just turn up the heat, they will eventually show you who they really are. Once they do, then you can decide, is this person really someone I want to spend a significant amount of time with?
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Comments
08.15.08
So true - I love it!
08.15.08
Oh, Lord. I would fail this test. I'm very impatient. I'm not sure patience is a test of who you are. But I agree that how you treat other people is. I always pay attention to how people treat the waitor or waitress. This is important to me.
What's the old plate of spaghetti thing?
08.15.08
This is a very good idea, I will be trying this asap! Thanks for the advice.
08.15.08
This is all very true. I've never done this on purpose, but I've been stuck in traffic with people, or in long lines. It's very telling to see how they respond - whether it's remaining calm in traffic or being patient in a long line. I can deal with traffic - I'm from L.A. and it's just part of life here. I do get mad at erratic drivers that are driving dangerously. I'm not going to lie about that one.
Another thing I like to observe is how people treat the wait staff at restaurants. Not necessarily their tipping habits (my personal policy is why would I tip you 15 or 20% if you didn't have a good attitude and never came around? Or after I told you I wanted white rice 5 times and you still brought me brown) - but how they talk to people, how demanding they are, how they respond when the server makes a mistake. That's a good one.
08.15.08
@Rebecca, the trick, in theory, was to serve your hapless date a plate of spaghetti. If they cut it up, then they are impatient and lacking in manners. If they take a spoon, and twirl the fork to get a nice wrap of spaghetti on their fork, they have nice manners or are well trained by mom.
Patience is definitely part of who you are, what sort of value you place on it, or lack thereof is a different story. Every personality trait you have makes up part of who you are. Not having it doesn’t make you a bad person, it just depends on what you are looking for.
@Dan, thanks, its my favorite for vetting the new boy/girl friends of family members.
@Alaia, good point, I will have to remember that as well.
Pilgrim
08.15.08
Interesting insight. Usually people are having a good time at amusement parks so maybe a line where you wouldn't be having so much fun would be a good test. There is a Wal-Mart near me that has ridiculous long lines at certain times of the day. Crying babies make it even worse. Good point about the woman wanting to sit in the shade though. And for the traffic…Certain days I would fail miserably. I tend to be aggressive while driving in traffic.
08.15.08
As the old saying goes, "Character is what you do when no one is looking."
08.15.08
@Kenneth, thank you, that's exactly what I took too many words to convey. ;)
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