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Monica O'Brien is using Brazen Careerist to share ideas. Join now to become a member and start networking with Monica O'Brien and other professionals just like you. Learn more.
As many of you know, I live/work in Madison, WI now. Sort of. Because I actually live/attend school in Chicago. Sort of. Confused yet?
Here’s the update on my new job:
It’s going great, except when I’m not working.
When I accepted the job at Brazen Careerist, my only stipulation was that I didn’t have to move. I have nothing against Madison; in fact, I enjoy the charm of the downtown area. But I have a life in Chicago that I love, and obligations in Chicago which I can’t leave.
So we decided I could commute to Madison two or three days a week. Which turned into five, I think. And to be honest, the whole commuting thing is not going so well.
Here’s my dilemma:
The difficult part about doing the job you want is you also want to be present for it. So I want to be in Madison, working in my little office, just about every day.
But not actually. Because Chicago is my home, and it’s where my heart is. It’s where my family is. It’s where my wonderful friends are. It’s where the skyscrapers that inspire me and captivate me are. So whenever I’m in Madison, I want to be in Chicago.
Chicago. Madison. Chicago. Madison?
It’s tough having two lives that pull you in different directions, and for awhile I really thought I could reject my time in Madison as “my life.” Instead, I would come here on vacation every week, sort of like a summer home. And I didn’t need a ton of friends in Madison, because I already have a lot of friends in Chicago. And I didn’t need a real place to stay and call my own in Madison, because I already own a condo in Chicago.
Here’s the lesson learned:
I was delusional to think commuting would be easy. Yeah, really. Delusional. And everyone tried to tell me this before I took the job, but I decided not to listen.
So here’s the one thing you need to consider when starting a job in a city you don’t live in: how much you love the job. Because trust me, if you don’t really love your job, you are not going to make it.
But for what it’s worth, I’m happy I didn’t listen to the naysayers. Because if I had thought this job opportunity through a little better I would have gotten too scared to do it. And that would have been stupid.
So here’s to the bright side of my double life: I have great coworkers. I’m doing something I love. I get to spend the summer in the beautiful state of Wisconsin. I get to buy all the clothes on the sales rack at Madison’s Urban Outfitters and wear them in Chicago where they would be double the price. My parents and husband are excited for me, and supportive of my career path. The Capitol is pretty when it’s lit up at night.
And I live in Madison. And I live in Chicago. Sort of.
@ Monica: Using public transportation makes it more of a viable option. People do it in NY all the time. However, most people are going INTO the city, now out of it!
In Florida, where I live, public transportation is almost non-existent. That, plus the almost disgusting amount of suburban sprawl, and you get people driving 50-75 miles each way for jobs.
...that's a situation where a good, high-speed train would come in handy.
I wish you luck with your endeavor through the summer and beyond.
@Torbjorn
You beat me to it, I was thinking the exact same thing.
OK...well those are huge details that you left out...makes a little more sense now.
Lol, I think those are just huge assumptions that people make because most people will drive their cars even if they are just going across the street.
I forget that I need to be explicit about using public transportation, walking, and biking everywhere, because on my own blog I make it pretty clear I think America's car addiction is ridiculous.
Anyway, I don't mean to take this discussion off topic. So yeah, I agree, I would never ever want a commute that cost me two hours of driving myself one way.
The main reason I wrote about this is because I think a lot of people actually make large commutes like this for various reasons. Relationships, jobs, cost of living, families. When I would hear about people doing these commutes I thought they were crazy, but now that I'm in their place I've realized everyone has their reasons - and maybe some of those reasons are good ones, even if no one else can see it.
Commuting 150 miles one way??? Life is too short to be spending that much time in traffic and wasting all that money on gas.
Norcross and Wicked, you make the assumption that I drive, but I take the bus, which is actually a great study place as there is nothing better to do on it. And I don't commute every day - I have a place in Madison so I spend chunks of days in each place. Hope that maybe makes more sense now.
Jaclyn, I have to wonder if you're right about something having to give eventually. It'll be interesting to see how the whole thing plays out - I'm up for a little adventure though :). At least for now.
Monica, love this post!
Definitely sounds like it is tough to juggle living/working in Chicago/Madison.
It seems like this is doable if it's a short-term thing, but I wonder if it sustainable indefinitely. Like at some point something has got to give, no? Either you'll have to choose job/location... which reminds me of one of your earlier posts...
150 miles? That sounds rather extreme, great job or not. Factor in fuel prices, time stuck in a vehicle that could be spent working / studying / sleeping, and what do you have left?
Don’t judge based on popularity or blind reciprocity, instead make sure they “get it” and just as importantly, that their followers “get it”. More...
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