Are you an introvert?

• Does a crowded room of people overwhelm you?
• Do you feel drained after interacting with a lot of people?
• Would you rather be at home writing on your blog than at an event?

If you answered yes, you’re probably an introvert.

Being an introvert is different than being shy. Introverts would rather be alone because that’s how they can become energized, not because they’re scared to interact with others. Introverts don’t necessarily dislike socializing, they just generally prefer to be alone or with a small group.

Why you should network

Since introverts prefer solitary activity, it can sometimes be difficult to convince yourself that you need to get out of the house and network. But, you do. (And, online networking doesn’t count in this case.)

Benefits to in-person networking:

• Learn from people you might otherwise not have met. In general, introverts enjoy learning. There’s a whole world of people to learn from out there and networking is a great way to meet them.
• Make connections with people who can help you. You could meet people who can help you find your next job, hook you up with a publisher for the book you’ve written, get you a great deal on your next car. You never know who you’ll meet when you’re at an event.
• Make connections with people you can help. Everybody loves to help other people – including introverts. You have a talent or a connection that can help someone else, and when you do, you’ll feel great about it.

Where to start

If you’ve been avoiding networking – or attending any kind of social event – because you don’t see the value or haven’t felt comfortable with it, follow these suggestions:

Use the buddy system
If you’re going to a networking event and you won’t know a lot of people, ask a friend to join you. It’s even better if your friend is an extrovert and can introduce you to a lot of people. (We’ll talk about what to say once you meet these new people in Part 2.)

Downsides to the buddy system:

• You could neglect to network with anyone except for your friend.
• Your friend could totally ditch you and leave unprepared to go out on your own.

Pick a sit down
Sit down dinners and lunches make it a lot easier to network. All you have to do is find an open seat and introduce yourself to the people on either side of you.

Downsides to sit downs:

• You could pick a table where everyone else knows each other and totally leaves you out of the conversation no matter how hard you try.
• If you don’t know your dinner etiquette, you might turn people off. (Hint: Follow others, you’ll be fine.)

Other networking tips

Give people something to talk about
Wear something memorable. (Hat tip: Kate @ Defending Pandora) Try a great necklace or brooch. You don’t have to go overboard, but people will talk to you if you stand out a little bit.

Get a drink
I’m not necessarily advocating for alcohol (although it’s not a bad idea), but a drink in hand helps you seem more a part of the party. And, you might be able to strike up a conversation with the person behind you at the bar.

Find someone alone
Walking into a crowded party where everyone else is talking can be a bit overwhelming. After you get your drink, scour the place for another lonely soul. There’s bound to be one somewhere.

Hang out by the food line
Food is a great conversation starter. “Oh don’t these stuffed mushrooms look wonderful!” Get a couple of appetizers and walk around. If you don’t find anyone to strike up a conversation with, get some more appetizers and try again.

Don’t dominate one person
Introverts enjoy deep conversations, not small talk. Pay close attention to the person you’re talking with to make sure they’re as engaged as you. You don’t want them to have to use drastic measures (e.g. faking an illness) to get out of the conversation with you.

Take breaks
It can be emotionally draining to be around all of these people for so long. Don’t let it get to you. Check your cell phone. Step outside. Visit the restroom. Take a break from the commotion so you could keep going.

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