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Email ThisThe unemployment rate is rising, but the National Association of Colleges and Employers says that the prospects of finding a job after college are actually “robust.” Forbes agrees. Deloitte’s research shows that (thanks to demographic trends) recent college graduates will have their pick of jobs for the next 10 years.
Don’t believe me? I recently spoke with Aaron Bare, CEO of Career Tours, an innovative, video-based job board. They are consistently attracting every kind of client, from the Minnesota State Patrol to huge corporations, like Microsoft and Nike. And the clients are all trying to figure out how to reach Millennial candidates.
That suggests that corporate America is no longer chasing just the class presidents and Ivy League elite–it’s the middle-of-the-pack folks, too. But being chased is a tricky game that young professionals–and their parents–need to learn how to win. And winning the game means learning some new rules.
Whatever you do, do not get sucked in by promises of a big salary, quick promotions, and a fancy office. That’s what a successful career used to be, but not anymore. By watching our parents, Millennials have learned that such things are just superficial rewards that leave you feeling burned out and empty at the end of the day (and at the end of your career).
Today, a successful career means finding a job (or two) that provides you with interesting work, a sense of fulfillment, and plenty of room for professional and personal growth. To find this kind of career, you must forget the money. Even in an amazing job market, no one gets perfect work at a great salary.
But passing on the big salary is not an easy thing to do. The average college student graduates with more than $20,000 in debt, and shacking up in any big city can put a serious dent in your wallet. I spent last year living in a two-bedroom apartment outside of Washington D.C. for $3,000 per month. When you figure in credit card debt, food and a social life, your monthly burn rate can be ridiculous.
This is where the parents come (back) in. You can call them overprotective and over-involved, but the smartest parents today are encouraging their kids to come back home for a couple of years after school. Moving home allows you to get a handle on your student loan and credit card debt by saving on rent. Plus, it enables you to jump-start the process of building a truly successful career, based on today’s standards, not the old days.
Only in America, and only in the past few generations, has living at home well into your twenties been frowned upon. But if you’re truly opposed to moving home, or you can’t stand your parents, get creative and find a job in a cheap city. Ryan Paugh and I have managed to live in Madison, Wisconsin since September on a minimal salary. Rent is a fraction of the price that it would be on the coast, and the living conditions are better in many ways.
Finding a great job in a smaller city might take a little more effort, but they’re out there, you just need to look in the right places. I know first-hand that Madison, Wisconsin and my home town of New Haven, Connecticut have a bunch of cool companies looking to hire hard working twentysomethings. I have to admit, it’s definitely time to give myself a raise, but the point is, you can live cheap if you face the reality that big cities aren’t always what they’re cracked up to be and good jobs do exist everywhere.
You’ll know you’ve achieved success when you wake up almost every morning excited about your job. So if finding that job means trading a couple of years on your own for a room at Mom and Dad’s, or giving up on living the dream in New York until you can afford it (when you’re a millionaire) that’s cool with me. I guarantee it’s worth it in the long run.
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Had my parents lived in the state when I graduated college I would have done this. Living at home for a couple years is the best way to get a handle on your finances and your career. When you go to college you are still that young kid who doesn’t care much about the real world - fast forward four years and all of sudden you are faced with the same hurdles as your parents. Living with them is a good way to “learn” how to handle these types of hurdles.
I think it’s sad the colleges put their graduates in unreasonable debt after four years of schooling. I know there’s options such as going to a two year community college close to home first but I still question the debt load after all is said and done. Now that the 4 year degree is the ‘baseline’ it appears to me as though colleges have a monopoly here and time to think outside the box as you have done. I remember one student when I went to school who was in his thirties as an undergraduate - older than the rest of us for whatever reason - financial or otherwise. His nickname was ‘pops’. I don’t even remember his real name now. Perhaps an option today would be to work first out of high school and find out what you really want to do for a career and save some money and then go back to school. Of course you risk being called pops or something like that!
Great title for this post. Although there is a recession, there is also a war for talent. The top 10-20% don’t have to worry.
Where does this sense of entitlement to live off of your parents come from?!
I have a Gen Y son who left college with about $20,000 in student loan debt (his share toward the total bill of about $80,000), but no credit card debt. He worked to earn enough to pay cash for a car. He always found a way to earn his own way and live within his means.
He is now a teacher, and while the pay is not great, he has found a way to make his own way. We have made it clear that a return home for any reason would not result in a subsidized lifestyle. He would pay market rent for a one bedroom apartment, a proportional share of the utilities and groceries, his own insurance and fuel. He also would not be allowed to use credit or make any major purchases until he was back out on his own.
Guess what? He decided to make his own way in the world - as he should. He decided not to take on any credit card debt to begin with. He decided he did not need an iPod, or to eat out, or to have the latest computer, or to have a fancy car, or to drink Starbucks coffee. He buys his clothes from resale shops. He does not have cable TV. His neighbors split the internet bill six ways and share a wireless signal.
My generation made its own way during a deep recession when unemployment was above 8%, and when jobs were much less plentiful than they are today, when interest rates were near 20% for a time, and the student aid program was in its infancy.
Building a successful career based upon “today’s standards, not the old days” is really just Gen Y code for “I don’t want to grow up yet Daddy”.
IMHO, to allow your children to come home to avoid the responsibility of making their own lives is not only a disservice to the parents who spent 20+ years supporting them already, but it perpetuates the culture of coddling which has the potential to create a weak generation of people unwilling to grow up, and unable to weather adversity.
Steve,
Isn’t part of the mentality of the boomer generation to try to give their kids better lives than they had? And wouldn’t that mean allowing them to come back home after graduation to save up a bit before they strike out on their own?
I understand and appreciate that your son is making it, but think about how much he could have saved if he stayed at home for at least 6 months before moving out–this savings would be his cushion in case anything ever happened with his health or his livelihood. Unless his staying with you would put an unnecessary strain on your finances, I don’t see it as “coddling”–it’s not like he’ll stay with you until he’s 30.
@Anna-
You operate from a false premise. It is not the mentality of the Boomers to GIVE their kids a better life.
First and foremost it is my obligation to give my children the tools to be as self sufficient as possible. The role of adversity and struggle in achieving that cannot and should not be underestimated.
The knowledge that coming back home is an option leaves no capacity for my son to understand the value of not making mistakes with career, credit, finances. You have to struggle and make some mistakes with only yourself to get you through it to truly value what rewards hard work, saving, and paying your dues really bring.
It is not my job to ensure his health or livelihood as an ADULT. That is his job. And you know what - I am very proud of him.
We had a conversation last week about this very subject. he told me of friends whose parents paid for 100% of school, bought them new cars, gave them a cash cushion, paid for the moving/security deposit expenses for their first apartments, etc.
He told me how many of these friends blew through it all, got credit cards, charged them up, got in trouble, called mom and dad to bail them out, and how the cord is never cut.
In a tender moment during the conversation, he choked up and offered these unforgettable sentences:
“Dad, I want to thank you for teaching me how to take care of myself. I know that no matter what happens to me, I can handle it.”
Talk about a proud papa.
Steve,
Once again you and I appear to have a disconnect. I’m not saying hand everything to your child on a silver platter. You’re talking about a major extreme here.
Example: I put myself entirely through (private) college. I did not live at home while school as in session. I worked multiple jobs on and off campus to pay for tution, room, board, and living expenses. When I graduated, I moved back home to save up money for my wedding and for living with my husband. I only stayed for about 9 months. I bought my own groceries, took short showers, and never adjusted the thermostat. Trust me, I know the value of a dollar, I am financially responsible, and I am in absolutely no debt.
I’m glad that you’re proud of your son, but I don’t see why you believe so strongly that your way is the only way.
Mark - great point about a 4-year degree now being a requirement. Colleges do have a monopoly, and their prices are rising now more than ever. College grads need to do something to “fight back.” Living with your parents for a little while seems like a good place to start.
Steve - Your son sounds like he’s got a good head on his shoulders. Making your own way in the world is extremely important, but who’s to say you can’t start at 25? Studies show that your brain isn’t fully developed until 26 years old, and you can google “Emerging Adulthood” to see that becoming an adult happens later now then ever before. And what’s the problem with that? We also live longer now, on average.
Steve, I’m GenX and my eldest child is only 6, but I’m absolutely with you on this one. (In fact, there’s been quite a resurgence of interest in “old school” parenting within GenX.)
From a purely pragmatic perspective, I worry about how much GenY is costing their parents in retirement income when they move home for months or years at a time. By the time your “adult child” is in his or her 20s, you should really be focusing on putting your money aside, not on continuing to support him or her. We all recognize that the social security system is failing, and we need to be in a position to support ourselves by and large. Some people are going to end up in real trouble. A small delay in saving can have a disproportionate impact in end result.
Seems to me that by charging your son market rent and for all the other “extras”–rather than shortsightedly shouldering that burden yourself–you managed to circumvent the claptrap altogether. And your son is the stronger for it. If you ask me, that’s an example of real parental responsibility.
This topic has been around many a time, and it’s most sensitive with those who HAVE kids and disagree. Clearly there are several types of parents, so who cares! Whatever floats your boat.
My folks wanted me back home (across the country), but mostly cause they didn’t want to see me slack my job search away and spend all too much cash while making none. So, I went home for 9 months at 23, MADE IT WORK, then was gone back across the country again when I was set. There was both push and pull factors while I was there; but the most important thing is that my mindset was that I WOULD be leaving again.
There are some that don’t leave until they are 27. I know of them, and that becomes both theirs and their folks’ problem.
Steve’s proud, let him be.
p.s - @Sean and Steve - you have to remember that to some retirees money is no longer an object and/or problem.
To SOME…
@Anna - you had a plan that involved a marriage with a set time limit. I think most parents, myself included, would see your path as a reasonable one to have been supportive of.
The author however has a much broader agenda than that though, which is really what I was addressing.
@Ryan - So now parents have to keep their children sheltered, fed and cared for until their brains (according to who knows who’s studies) fully develop???
Becoming an adult is only happening later than ever before because these helicopter parents are letting it happen. Their children are not learning to grow up.
And why does fighting back at the cost of school have to be at the expense of your parents? Most of us at least helped you pay for college to begin with for crying out loud.
It sounds like you are advocating for an entitlement to avoid adversity. This to me is the heart of the issue. Adversity is what teaches you life’s most valuable lessons. It is the urgency of it which creates the value in what you do with your time, your money and your career.
I fear a future where people do not know what it is like to struggle. When real tragedies happen in our society, who will be strong enough to endure them? Certainly not those who have been protected from it.
@Steve - I see your point, and I agree that people should be equipped to deal with difficult situations when they arise, but we’re talking about a couple of years here. It’s not about entitlement to avoid adversity, it’s about playing the game and doing whatever you can to avoid unnecessary hardship.
This doesn’t need to be a burden on your parents, and in many cases parents would love to have their kids home. You can still pay rent, do chores around the house and go grocery shopping for the family. It seems smart on all sides. Plus, if you give your kids a few years to save money at home, maybe they’ll have enough saved up to help you with retirement when the time comes. It’s like trading your resources now for their resources later.
The thing that you have to keep in mind is that today’s market is very very different than the one that previous generations went into after graduation. The dollar is very weak and inflation has gotten completely out of control. To say that the entire generation should pick themselves up by the bootstraps and make our own way is to ignore the economic reality out there.